I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said.
I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?"
I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious."
I said, "Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?" He said, "Christian."
I said, "Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?" He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?" He said, "Baptist!"
I said,"Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or baptist church of the lord?" He said, "Baptist church of god!"
I said, "Me too! Are you original baptist church of god, or are you reformed baptist church of god?" He said,"Reformed Baptist church of god!"
I said, "Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!"
I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.